|Photo by Marina Bromley|
Tuesday, April 27, 2021
Sunday, March 7, 2021
There’s so much division in society today, in marriages too. I can’t remember a time that I’ve known so many women going through difficult seasons in their marriages. So many couples separated or filing for divorce. Even Christian couples. If you are struggling in your marriage, or going through a separation right now, this is my prayer for you…
Lord, I lift my sister and her husband up to You and I ask that you will send a Spirit of unity to their home, their relationship right now. I pray Father that you will bring them to a place of common ground. That you will give them opportunities to cheer for the same team, to share laughter or tears, and make memories together.
God will you help them to fall in love with each other all over again? Please give them hearts willing to fall in love with each other. Remove any other people from their marriage relationship, any outsider that is pursuing romance, and also any meddling family members trying to manipulate them into divorcing. Father, help them to remember the way they looked into each other’s eyes on the day that they got married. Let them remember the love that they felt, the passion for each other, as they said their vows. The way they couldn’t wait to be alone and the way their hands tingled when they touched each other. Lord, rekindle those passions, despite busyness, kids, work, health problems, growing old, and any other reason they are not being close to each other. Remind them that it’s not always about sex (but that can be great too!) but about passion, attention, exclusivity, and kindness.
Lord, heal the areas of their marriage that have been fractured. Help them to forgive each other and to remember to do sweet things for each other. Help the other spouse to appreciate those things, and to remember to say “thank you” for doing them. Because of YOUR great love for us, God, help us to love and serve each other, as you direct us in Hebrews 10:24 “Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.” Then from those good things may a pattern of love and kindness continue.
May we delight in the Lord today, and through His filter of love, may we find joy in our marriages.
In Jesus’ name, Amen
Friday, March 5, 2021
Hello friends! Most of us have lived through things that we wouldn’t wish on our kids or grandkids. I’ve learned so much in my own healing process—especially how childhood traumas can effect our mental and physical bodies.
I wrote this a year ago, but felt led to share it again, both because it’s still valid, but maybe even more so as we have come a full year of traumatic changes from Covid—from quarantines, masks and separating, and losing loved ones, to the changes our kids have come through—schooling constantly changing, anxiety from OUR anxiety, and uncertainty from the future.
We are not alone in any of this, and God is a constant source of help in times of trouble. Sometimes He heals through our prayers and laying on of hands, and sometimes He chooses for us to do the hard work of couns ling and medications, but He walks with us (and our kids) either way.
When a child is hurt physically, emotionally, sexually, or in combinations of ways, damage is done much deeper. It doesn’t have to be someone hurting them intentionally, even the death of a parent (or other beloved family member), standing on the sidelines watching your parents fight through divorce, or witnessing a traumatic accident or event, can cause injury to their fragile brains and bodies that can exacerbate into illness over time. A lifetime of traumas can leave layers of damage.
There are combinations of therapies that can help, but it takes time to discover what works for each person. Please be patient! If one thing isn’t working, please try something else, and keep trying! You are worth every moment, every hour of therapy, every dollar of uncovered medication.
The situations that affected my childhood were not known or acknowledged as a child or a teen, and I was never given the opportunity to go to counseling to address the abuse and trauma, see a medical doctor to see if physical damage was done, or given medication to help me handle situations or circumstances. As an adult I’ve revisited professional counseling a few times, pastoral or mentor counseling occasionally, pressed in to God and lifted up in prayer by many sweet friends regularly, and of course an integrated medical care program now to not only help me cope, but to heal. It seems each time I’m confronted with similar situations, it tears off the scab and the PTSD causes me to address layers of it all over again. It has affected my health since my childhood, in so many different ways, but back then no one connected those dots between abuse, life’s traumas, and mental and/or physical health.
If you have been a victim, you need to be kind to yourself. If you have faced (or are facing) medical issues, perhaps there’s a deeper thread still damaged that needs to be addressed. Only you can make that decision, but remember this—you are worth it, and you deserve whatever treatment is needed to help you heal. Untreated, unaddressed issues from your past will affect your physical and mental health going forward in the future. You deserve to be healthy and whole and healed!
Being healed is not saying that nothing ever happened to you, it says that the things that happened to you yesterday can not control you today, and prayerfully not tomorrow either. Seeking treatment in whatever modalities work for you is not admitting weakness, but advocating for healing and encouraging the strong places in yourself to fight. It’s standing your ground and asking for help from people you love to walk with you as you sort through the past, release and forgive, reconcile and restore, what is rightfully yours.
Brokenness doesn’t mean useless. God knows the tender places within you, and He desires to walk with you on this path too. He loves you so much, and He will never leave you alone.
Psalm 139:1-18 NLT
O LORD, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. You know what I am going to say even before I say it, LORD. You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand! I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave,a you are there. If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me. I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night—But even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you. You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!
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